You know how in every comic book movie the hero has a crisis of faith? Loses the girl. Suffers defeat. Questions himself. And, then just disappears. Retreated into solitude. To reconsider his purpose. To question his calling. Might review, from his fortress or lair, a video montage from his home planet and tragically deceased parents. Or stare wistfully into the eyes of his own crumpled mask. The people of planet earth or some generalized metropolitan city abandoned to the unchecked lawlessness of villainy. Puppy-eyed children look helplessly into the sky for a return. Some sign. Hero-betrayed.

And, then, in the moment of greatest need, splashed across the sky, a contrail of flight or burst of light or silhouetted, back-lit signal.

Yeah. He’s back.

(Large disembodied head emoji courtesy of Tommy Wilkinson.)

Oh if I had a nickel for every time I was called one.

It also happens to be the name of a news archive site that now hosts lyrics to my Press Junket blongs!

News Genius is a family of sites, including Rap Genius, which, in the tradition of Wikipedia, relies on crowdsourcing to accumulate content and related annotations. For example, if one of my songs were to ridiculously reference Monopoly’s billionaire mascot, Uncle Pennybags, a site user could post the song and annotate that particular lyric to explain the reference. This is all totally hypothetical, of course. No one would ever say Uncle Pennybags in a rap. In gang parlance, that would make you a mark.

So my man Methus has volunteered to post my blong entries and begin the annotation process. But, the clever thing about it is that anyone can join him! Feel free to transcribe past blongs or contribute to exposition of lyrics already uploaded. If nothing else, for me, news genius will be a good library of my blong material and compliment to what I do here. I hope it expands your enjoyment.

Sincerely, the News Genius